Poetry and Quotes

Families are held together by choice.

Members are alike and unalike,

yet there is comfort in the sameness,

and excitement in the differences.

When we respect and relish both conditions,

we can call ourselves Family.

~ Maya Angelou

Lighten the Heart

According to researchers, laughter increases relaxation and helps calm muscle tension. So give your body a break and enjoy some lighthearted words. . .

FAMILY DICTIONARY EXCERPTS:

  • DROOLING: How teething babies wash their chins.
  • FEEDBACK: The inevitable result when the baby doesn't appreciate the strained carrots.
  • PUDDLE: A small body of water that draws other small bodies wearing dry shoes into it.
  • TEMPER TANTRUMS: What you should keep to a minimum so as to not upset the children.
  • WHOOPS: An exclamation that translates roughly into "get a sponge."

Spirit and Inspiration

In this adoption process, you can't just rely on research outcomes, finding the best mailing list, a top-notch professional, good looks or money! While there are some things in our control like educating ourselves, getting support, being genuine with birth families, there are many more things not in our control. How do we then deal with the loss of control?

You need to believe there is something greater happening here - a higher power in control. You need to get to a place where you can let go of the control and trust that things will unfold as they should. We all agree that's easier said than done. Think of another time in your life when you had to just let go and/or trust others to help during a challenging time.

Whether you believe in a god or not, there are times when we rely on blind faith and believe in a greater power or being to help us through our challenges. Find ways to nurture yourself, your spirit, your physical body. Pray, meditate, create a mantra, post inspirational messages, keep a journal, join a support group, attend church, even seek counseling. Most importantly, surround yourselves with friends and family who are supportive of your dreams to grow your family through adoption. Connect in with a higher power.

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Other ideas to provide inspiration (and survive the wait):

  • Knit or sew some baby clothes (knitting is a very meditative process)
  • Build your child's library (don't forget to include adoption related books)
  • Begin learning lulabys and nursery rhymes (time to beef up your guitar skills)
  • Check out preschools, mother's clubs, nanny services (are there wait lists?)
  • Identify your local playgrounds (dog parks don't count)
  • Research and/or purchase car seats and strollers (never used equipment!)
  • Begin your child's baby album / scrapbook (time for a new camera?)
  • Take a CPR/First Aid Course (specific to infant and children)
  • Babysit your friends infants and/or toddlers (good practice!)

Create a Place of Hope

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Start preparing your nursery. Wow! Some say this is a bold idea or may jinx the process - what if things fall through? It is certain that some of you may have this experience, but as most adoption professionals will tell you, you WILL adopt a child. The day and time may be uncertain, but it WILL happen. Preparing your nursery can offer a sense of hope and excitement - it definitely helps pass the time! What gender do you decorate for? There are plenty of nursery themes and color schemes that are gender neutral.

Other reasons to begin preparing your nursery? Sometimes a placement happens sooner than you'd think! Sometimes the furniture you'd like to order will be back-ordered and takes months to arrive! Preparing your nursery can also be like preparing a personal retreat space. It can be a place to inspire your journal writing, poetry for your newborn, and dreams for your future family.

You may also consider getting a rocking chair early. Put it in your nursery - sit in it, get the feel of it, read some children's books aloud (good practice). Enjoy the rocking motion - another way to relax. Look around the room and invision all the great fun and endless hugs and kisses that will happen in this room. You're going to have a family!

Here are some online resources for nursery rooms: